Archive for the ‘Motivation for the Job Search’ Category

Goldfish Crackers are a standard in most homes with children. My two children have always loved them.  Yesterday as I was putting away groceries, the word Optimism caught my eye on a big box of whole grain baked Goldfish with the important note: “Optimism is a skill children can learn and leads to greater happiness and resilience.”

As an advocate of Positive Psychology and building optimism, I went straight to the website to read more about “Fishful Thinking”. Pepperidge Farm’s Read the rest of this entry »

My colleague, Career Counselor Ilana Levitt and I were in our respective Yoga classes recently and had a similar epiphany.  We were both struck by the relevance of Yoga practice to our work with people stuck in various stages of their job search or career development.
Ilana and I are dedicated to helping people break through the psychological barriers that are keeping them from moving forward in their job search or careers.   So, what do you say, are you open to some stretching? Thanks Ilana for sharing your experience.

Instructions: Take your left leg and cross the left thigh over the right. 2. Hook the left foot around the right calf. 3. Bring the arms out in front. 4. Cross the right arm over the left and bring the palms to touch. 5. Lift the elbows while keeping the shoulders sliding down the back. 6. Hold 5-10 breaths. 7.  Repeat on the other side.

This is called the Eagle Pose in Yoga. Why do I describe the instructions to you? Because I stood in yoga class last week, and tried this pose, and tried again. My foot kept going back to the floor when I wanted it to stay up. My arms came down as I struggled to keep my foot up.  And then the instructor said something so profound that I thought everyone struggling with career transitions and job searches ought to hear it too.

“Hold the pose, even though your body will naturally want to go back to the most relaxed state possible.  But if you hold the pose, this will become easier to do.” Read the rest of this entry »

As a trained counselor and therapist, it doesn’t take me long to detect that a job seeking client is stuck for reasons other than a challenging economy. Let me introduce the experiences of three people I have met over the last few years:

It took quite a bit of encouragement to get Dan into my office to talk about his job search, despite his reaching out to me with initial enthusiasm. His ambivalence soon became evident. Agreeing to one session, Dan and I met and his fears and anxieties  filled the room. In the midst of  a very successful career, he had lost his job while at the top of his game. The rug was pulled out from under him and he was not prepared to deal with the  sense of anger and betrayal that he felt. The negative chatter in his head had paralyzed him and his frustration was palpable. Starting the job search made him feel very vulnerable. Dan was going to have to process the meaning of his job loss before he could move on. Read the rest of this entry »

3. The Gift of a Positive Attitude: You may be in a difficult place with your job search, and understandably so– an ongoing job search, being stuck in a job you hate, or chronic underemployment are all very demoralizing, but an optimistic outlook (ok, not that easy to find at times, but dig up whatever you can), can be beneficial on a number of levels.

Positivity is infectious and the more positive energy you exude, the more others will be inclined to want to talk with you and help you. Taking along your positive attitude might also help someone else who isn’t feeling so good. And if you need a little pick me up, see how other people do it at the Happiness Project or the Positivity Blog. Sometimes, it’s just getting out of the house and being around others that can help you forget about your woes for the time being.

A holiday party, for instance, is a time to put aside those anxieties, relax and make the most of being around old friends, new friends, fellow job seekers and who knows who else, right? Make the decision to show up with the most positive and open mind because the chances of you leaving feeling even better is directly correlated to your positive approach.  Alternatively, take a friend or two to your next party, particularly if you know someone who does not get out enough right now and needs to do more networking, because, the more the merrier when spreading good cheer.

4 Don’t Overlook the Gifts Others Will Have For You. It is easy to go into a networking event or party, take a quick glance, and decide, “There is nobody worth networking with”. Of course, this not a very constructive attitude to go anywhere with, and in fact, since networking is about getting to know people, unless you have really made every effort to do that, that judgment call is inherently false. In fact, everyone has something of value to offer, and if it’s not immediately evident, your task is to engage until you figure out what that nugget of uniqueness is and with enough inquiry and curiosity, you might be pleasantly surprised by what you find out.

You may have holiday parties lined up with family and friend and believe that no networking is going to take place there. However, you might find yourself reconnecting with cousins, aunts, or friends of friends you only get to see around the holidays. Do they know you are on the market for a new opportunity? Do you know what type of work they all do, where they work, and how they got there? Maybe not, so be prepared to find out what they do, ask questions about their career trajectory, and any other good advice they can share with you. Never dismiss anyone and their potential to share something with you and vice versa. With an open mind, and a little curiosity, you might walk away with a lot more than you expected.

5. The Gift of Genuine Interest. Find out who is going to be at your various networking events by calling your friends, perusing the evite invitations, or Meetup.com RSVP’s, and then select 1 or 2 acquaintances (or more, per party) who you have always wanted to get to know better but haven’t had the chance. You’ve seen these people at networking events before and you know a little about them and want to know more because they do something you are interested in, worked a company you are exploring, or they are just interesting. If you know they will be at a party you are going to, do some research (No this is not snooping, just a little networking preparation). This way, you will be able to engage in some meaningful conversation, and be ready with some strategic questions that might help you learn more about a company you are interested in, or about their particular expertise. By having learnt a little about them, make your acquaintance feel special, and interested in what they do and have to offer, without asking too many questions. Most people loved to be asked advice, and are generally very willing to share their knowledge with interested parties. So, show your genuine interest, and you just might reap the rewards of a more fulfilling conversation.

6. The gift of a Linkedin Connection . Don’t underestimate how you might be able to help someone by inviting them into your network. A Linkedin invitation is ideally a mutually beneficial experience; assuming that both parties are equally invested in their professional networks and they both use Linkedin. So, go armed with your business card, and if you don’t have one, now is the time to invest in one. Vistaprint is relatively inexpensive, and easy to design online. This is one present you need to give yourself and the most important piece of information you can have on it is your Linkedin Profile URL. Before you leave, don’t forget give your card to every person you have talked to, and invite them to connect. You might be the link to helping someone else find a job, and that’s priceless, and not just for the lucky person. Being the essential connection in that process will pay long-term dividends back to you.

So, pay-it forward and put some good will out there this holiday season, everyone will be very grateful and you won’t be forgotten.  Ultimately, that’s what really counts.

September is a month of transitions. Whether it’s starting something new, or returning to an established routine, starting afresh is generally the theme. For those in career transition, it might be the month where you commit to buckling down to your search or career change (again?).  Granted, there are always lots of distractions during the summer and it can be hard to stay 100% focused on the goal at hand!   Of course,  that’s often a good thing and a welcome break.  But Labor Day has come & gone—and now it’s time to get re-focused.  For those of you who’ve been on the hunt for a while, the challenges to “getting back on the bike” so to speak, abound. In my work with clients, the three most common obstacles that jump out at me are lack of momentum, confidence and having a strategic plan.   While thinking about this the other day, it brought to mind my experience of watching my five-year-old daughter learn to ride a bike this summer. And then there is my story too.

My enthusiastic five-year-old is excited about learning to ride when there are no obstacles in the way, but when the path gets a little bumpy, she’s easily discouraged.  We encourage her to stay focused and keep on peddling, the bumps in the road will soon “disappear”, or at least she won’t feel them as much.

On the flip side, I didn’t learn how to ride a bike until I was 29 years old. (Yes, believe it or not, but there are a few of us on this planet who, as kids, did not have this privilege!  And luckily, there are actually teachers who specialize in helping adults ride bikes.)  Living in New York City at the time, my inability to ride a bike got the better of me, and my determination overtook whatever fear I had developed.

You probably get where I’m going with this—job seeking is a lot like learning to ride a bike.  When the job hunt gets tough, it’s easy to get discouraged and frustrated by the daunting challenge. So where do you find the motivation and support to “pick yourself up, brush off, and move forward?” — You heard it as a child, maybe, but how about now?  What’s helping you move your job search forward despite the numerous obstacles that might stand in your way?

Here are five ways that I liken my own “learning to ride a bike” experience to the job search:

I. Announcing that I was finally going to learn to ride a bike: Accountability

I let a group of friends know that I was going to learn how to ride a bike, that summer, no matter what. After that, the secret was out, and I couldn’t let myself down.  Do you have a group that you are accountable to in your job search? I see how easy it is for job seekers and career changers to lose momentum when going it alone, and that means not even reaching out to your community for support.  I have run many job search support groups over the years because I see the value, not only in the emotional support, but also for helping people stay accountable to someone other than themselves. – More about that further on.

2. I found a professional teacher: Seek help from an expert

Having never learned how to ride a bike, I knew I would need an expert to help me. I didn’t want to put my friends through the grueling process.  I found a professional who specifically taught adults how to ride bikes.  Yes, you truly can find anything you need in NYC.  He was also a great teacher, had a group of about 10 of us riding in one weekend. Of course, you say, it’s easy, but not for a group of adults who have never ridden a bike in their lives. Having an expert share current advice and techniques is invaluable. These days making the financial investment can be daunting, but having a prolonged unemployment could be worse.

3. Found the motivation to learn to ride a bike before I was 30 years old.  Set a specific goal(s)

Having a birthday milestone and a specific task to accomplish before that date is as specific as it gets. With the job search, watching ones bank balance diminish might be motivation enough, but not for everyone.  The type of goals job seekers should be considering include – Making X number of networking phone calls a week, Attending X number of networking events per week, Making X number of new connections on linkedin.com.

4. Put aside my fear and trepidation with a greater goal in mind.  Focus on building confidence.

While I had never ridden a bike before, I knew I could do it, and just had to get over the chatter in my head.  The same goes for the job search. Unfortunately, the problem with so many job seekers I meet is that the greatest obstacles often lie in their head. It’s easy to build up in ones mind all the reason’s why someone will not hire you. In fact, to put your fears and doubts in perspective, read Bonnie Lowes list of  50 Reasons You Didn’t Get the Job . I hope this will inspire a laugh at your imperfect self, and move on.

5. Joined a bicycle riding group lesson: Don’t go it alone

When I signed up to learn to ride a bike, I wasn’t alone. As I mentioned before, there were about 10 of us, and it really helped to know I wasn’t the only adult out there that had never learned to ride. It was also great to have the camaraderie and support as we made our maiden voyage around Central Park.

Research has shown that job seekers or anyone going through a big transition fare better with the encouragement and insight of a small group designed to help members move forward toward the end goal.  Job Search support groups abound. You can find them most easily on one of my favorite websites: www.meetup.com

If you don’t find one near you, start it yourself and find the support you need. I look forward to starting a new telephone job search group at the end of this month. Let me know if you are interested.

6. Learn the right way. Understand the techniques that work (especially if they have changed).

Now you must be thinking, “but it’s easy to learn to ride?”.  Well, not really, particularly for a group of ol’ folks like myself with all types of bad habits and inhibitions… And, anyway, would you say the same for the job search?   Learning the exact technique, and what do in various scenarios from our teacher was essential and by the end of the weekend we ALL rode the entire Central Park loop!   This is one of the most important tips to take into consideration today, because if you are following old-fashioned job search techniques, waiting for opportunities to appear online, you are out of touch with how to find work in this new economy. Make sure you learn how to actively use social networking tools to expand your job search, and build your online reputation.

Taken step-by-step, neither learning to ride a bike nor finding the right job seems as daunting, does it?  And eventually, both are accomplished!

Need some support getting “back on the bike” or maybe some or guidance on how to do it right so you can start to see some results, drop me a line at Donna@careerfolk.com.  Maybe you know someone that could use a shot of inspiration. Please share this story.  Maybe you have a story of how you achieved your own personal goal, I would love to hear it too. Thanks for reading.